We the People

When we first got to China, Mister and I were walking through a nearby park and I told him, "People are really happy here!" I was genuinely surprised. I have always felt bad for the lack of freedom the Chinese have.

-Their freedom of speech is restricted.
-They can't have more than one child without heavy taxes.
-Media is heavily influenced and censored by the government.
-They can't move with the freedom we can.
-They have absolutely no representation in the government (can you say "taxation without representation"?)

This bookstore is in an old parking garage. There were hundreds of books, but not all of the books we have access to in the US.

Despite this and more, the people are happy. They are "a people". They are together. They are pleased with how far their country has come. They are proud of their country.

Can we say the same thing?



I distinctly remember the first presidential election that "mattered" to me. I don't remember the issues of my sophomore year election so much as the feelings.

With each of the following presidential campaigns and elections those feelings from my youth have become more familiar...

My stomach and chest knot up.
I feel helpless.
I feel frustrated.
I feel sick.
Can you relate?

The thing is, I don't think it's due to the worry about "my" side winning (at least not mostly). It's about how people are treating each other. It's about how I don't feel like "a people" with my fellow Americans. It's about how I don't feel too proud of my country.

The election days are filled with snide comments and not-so-uplifitng discussions.

It is true: we are a country that prides itself in it's diversity. With that diversity comes diverse opinions. That being said, I think it's time we take a lesson from the Chinese.

A monk near a place where Chinese come to burn incense. (Their form of prayer)

We have a president. Let's be "a people" to make our nation the country it is meant to be. Let's get to work to use the representation others don't have to build up this nation. Let's do our part by working hard and taking care of our people and our cities the best we can.

Let's do this. (A message from my church leaders that anyone can relate to-democrat, republican, or neither.)

I'm going to try for this one

and this one. (Last week at 32 weeks!)

Roasting Marshmallows

Fall is here in Nanjing. It was hot and humid one day and we woke up shivering under our little sheet the next!

Halloween came up on us a lot like the weather did. It wasn't on our minds as much since no one really celebrates--although there are some Halloween decorations for sale in the bigger grocery stores.

We very much missed the friends, family, food, and atmosphere of the beginning of fall, but we tried our best to feel some of it here. :)

We had TWO cute little pumpkins. This beauty (on the right) was in the produce section at the grocery store and I couldn't resist.

Cooked pumpkin! Have I mentioned that there is literally no canned food here? My cooking with a Chinese crockpot skills have had to get better (or at least my attempts are more frequent)!

Mister and I had this pumpkin bread on our date night in. Since chocolate chips are $6 a bag, we settled for some hot chocolate and played "Halloween Scrabble"--pretty much impossible. :) We also watched Hocus Pocus on Youtube. Can you  believe he had never seen it??

To top our October festivities off, our friends got together for a little Halloween party. Maybe not up to US standards, but I was pretty impressed!

We had food:

mummy cupcakes

finger cookies

no bake spiders

eyeballs

We had fun:

Can you guess what we are??

The babies are something sweet. mmm!

What a great group!

Miss A fell over trying to walk--that's what a big marshmallow she was!

A Few of Our Favorite Things

Mister is writing an essay about the "convenience" of Nanjing for foreigners. Some city leaders are interested in a foreigners perspective of Nanjing, so the Flagship students get to be the experts.

Is life here convenient for us? Thinking about it made me realize I am starting to get used to things that weren't at all convenient at first.--

Like taking a bus, riding the subway, or walking wherever I go.
Like carrying groceries all the way home.
Like making sure I don't use water out of the tap.
Like oh, ya know, not being able to communicate.

After two months of living here, I would say life actually is pretty convenient--just in a different way.

In celebration of surviving for two whole months, here are some things we really like.

Most bigger supermarkets have a least 2 floors. How do you get hundreds of grocery carts up and down these floors? A moving ramp. This is one of my favorite things--a rest from grocery shopping! I kind of like the two people in the picture, too.

We've been sleeping with a little sheet so this new blanket is our new favorite thing.

1911 Yogurt: it is so delicious!! Miss A likes the drinkable kind too, but this is creamy and has real fruit in it! Woo!

Little french rolls=mmm. Meat flavored Cheetos=not so much. 

Rice cakes and birthday cake Oreos! There are some crazy flavored Oreos here (mango-orange, kiwi-strawberry...), but birthday cake are the way to go.

These eyes-my very most favorite.

That's Just the Way it is

We went to the Xuan Wu Lake this weekend. It was a beautiful day, Mister had just finished a soccer game, and an international food fair was being held at the lake. We were very much hoping "international" would include American cuisine (oh so adventurous, I know).

The lake is huge. There is a road that goes all around and in the middle of the lake. There are rock formations, statues, booths, and much more. It is usually a very peaceful place, but the food festival brought hundreds and hundreds of people.

Our first glimpse at the booths. It looks promising--almost like a fair in Provo!

It turns out, the food booths were about as international as Nanjing itself. There was plenty of Chinese food. There was KFC (sold out). There was nothing else.

Live chicken, anyone? $3/lb

On the "fresh" theme--some live crabs cooking away.

Pig tongue and ear. A woman told us it was very good. I think she could tell we didn't quite believe her.

Tang Bao (soup rolls) are delicious and pretty cool!

The ratio of Chinese food booths (many) to international booths (one) doesn't even really represent that of the Chinese to foreign population. There are 13,000+ expats living in Nanjing. That seems like a pretty big number, don't you think?? Well, it makes up a big 0.2% of the 7 million+ people living in urban Nanjing!

No wonder people get excited or take Miss A's picture when they see her. I can't think of anything in America to compare it to...even Utah has more diversity.

At the lake

Thinking about this, it makes so much more sense why things are the way they are here. Why the selection of food is different and smaller, why it is hard to find shampoo for my type of hair, why there is just one Indian restaurant and one Middle Eastern restaurant that we know of in the whole city, why it is so difficult to find deodorant for men and tampons for women.

Things are the way they are because, for the most part, they work. Chinese like certain foods, have very similar hair, eat at certain restaurants, and often (but not always) don't need deodorant. Majority rules on this one.

China isn't outdated or old-fashioned, the people just like what they like. Kind of like I like to eat cold cereal every morning. Wise choice? Not the best, but I get my vitamins and minerals and a mama knows what she likes!

Traditional Baby

We're getting to the point where we can't really ignore it any more.

I'm having a baby here.
in Nanjing.
We're going to be a family of four.

I'm not old enough to have two children, right?? We've found a good, Taiwanese hospital and have a doctor we love. We're still hearing different things about whether or not Mister can be in the delivery room. (He says no one will keep him out...)

Almost 31 weeks (according to our doctor here, already 32 weeks with a due date of December 16th)

It's a good think we have such great Chinese traditions to make sure everything goes smoothly!

-Rubbing the belly could spoil the baby.
-If a mom uses glue or adhesive, there could be birthing complications.
-Using scissors or knives (especially near the bed) may make the baby have a cleft palate.
-If a mom walks without swinging her arms, talks softly, and avoids foul language the baby will be well behaved.
-If the mom criticizes anyone, the baby will look and act like that person.
-Pregnant women should eat cold food to keep their yin and yang balanced.
-If the belly is pointed, it is a boy (he's looking out at the world, and is independent).
-If the belly is round, it is a girl (she's looking in, hugging her mom).
-Mothers should avoid funerals because there could be evil spirits there.
-It is very uncommon for parents to name the baby before it is born. Instead, they often give the baby false names (the name of an animal or just "ugly") to trick evil spirits so they won't take the baby.

You should hear the postpartum ones.

So Shocking

It takes me a few minutes to register that I'm hearing English when I'm out on the streets. This time it didn't take as long. We were about 3 minutes from home when I heard a young man talking about China--in English. He was telling his noticeably quiet friend all about China. All about how horrible it is.

He continued behind us. I was very much looking forward to turning off of the street and getting to our apartment building, but just our luck--he followed right behind us. He persisted to point out all of the things that China does wrong. When he got to the elevator (and IN the same elevator as us) he explained how inefficient the elevator system and building planning were.

I was surprised by my reaction. I wasn't just annoyed, I was kind of...angry.

I couldn't believe he was saying these things right in front of so many people.  Even more, I felt like he was putting down my home.


I was a little worked up about this guy until I remembered something we learned in our culture prep class at BYU: culture shock.


We feel like we had it pretty easy as far as the difficult parts of culture shock go, but sometimes I wonder if we just didn't notice it going on. I think many people experience culture shock and don't even realize it's happening. Have you ever moved to a new place (even just from one city or state to another)? You've probably gone through some degree of culture shock.

There are 4 stages to culture shock. They don't always come in a specific order, or even just once each.

Honeymoon: This wasn't the first feelings we had when we arrived in China. First, there was exhaustion and what-are-we-doing-here feelings. After that we ate out, we bought inexpensive fruit, we walked down the quaint backstreets of Nanjing--this was the life!

Hostile: This is the stage that our "elevator friend" must have been in. I'm embarrassed to admit that this stage still hits me every once in a while. Sometimes I just want to stay holed up in our little home so I don't have to deal with being surrounded by the Chinese language.

Humor: Peeing on the street, a line of young men carrying bags together, mismatched outfits, old ladies singing karaoke in the park--we've laughed a lot since being here.

Can you see what's going on here? There is a woman cleaning a building by hanging from a rope held by a man.

At the top sits another man. Maybe keeping an eye on the rigging?

Home: I'm feeling this one more and more. Not just when we are sitting in our comfortable apartment or eating foods we are used to--but when I am walking in the park. maneuvering the busy streets, and buying produce from our fresh market. And what a good home it is.

"No matter what, no matter where, it's always home if love is there." (Thanks to a great mother-in-law, we have this saying framed in our home here to remind us that things can be good whatever the situation.)

I Can't Resist the Little Miss

We are living a crazy life in this place called China, but a lot of times it is still just regular old life.

When we were getting ready to leave for China I spent a lot of time thinking: what is my reason for going to China? Of course a huge reason was supporting Mister, but I felt like I needed to know why I needed to be there as an individual as well. The thought kept coming, "to be a mother." This was weird to me because I can be a mom anywhere, but maybe I wouldn't be the same mom if we weren't living here.

We stick out like a sore thumb in Nanjing where there aren't too many foreigners--and even less with children. Since we are watched all of the time, I am constantly aware of and analyzing the kind of parent I am becoming. (I have a long ways to go at figuring this whole mother thing out!)  :)

Despite my novice skills, Miss A has delighted us with her sweet personality and love to learn new things.

**This post may only be interesting to close family, but feel free to read on if you wish. :)

Miss A does chores.

• She loves to wash herself, the floor, her baby, and anything else she can get to. (She especially loves to clean things if she gets a hold of a pack of baby wipes and pulls all of them out.) 
• These days I have to leave the dust pan and little broom out for her when I finish sweeping. 
• She wants to help put the dishes away (even if they are still drying).
• She tries to dress herself (and gets frustrated when she can't put on her own sock).
• She feeds her baby (A few days ago I found a stray piece of pancake smashed into the doll's mouth...

Wipes all pulled out, changing pad down, washing her baby

Miss A does signs.

• drink, more, up, down, food, all done, please, bye, and thank you (and boy does she use them to communicate!)

Her favorite sign right now: up. She loves to be held (unless she wants to walk...)

Miss A does talking.

• Her favorite phrase is "Where'd it go??" She holds up her arms like she's asking a question and says something that sounds like "wha-go go?"
• She loves to say "woah!" when she likes something or is suprised.
• I don't think I can keep track of all the words she says, but I'll take a shot for record's sake: baby, more, please, mom, dad, bye, hi, uh oh, woah! (favorite), banana, ny night, bath, ball, please, drink, down, sock, shoes, mouth, nose, eyes, ear, hair, dog, mao (cat in Chinese), and no.

Where'd it go? (the baby--she has been calling all of our bellies babies lately)

Miss A does play

• She loves books, especially about animals and learns more animal sounds each day.
• She will transfer things (toys, our shoes, anything and everything) from one place to another all day long.
• She laughs and laughs when she plays "rough" with Mister.
• She has a sense of humor and likes to do things she thinks are funny

Best person to play with ever.

Miss A does messes.

• She splashes in the bath like it's no one's business.
• She takes out anything she can get her hands on.
• She pours her drinks on her highchair and splashes around.
• She throws food on the floor when she's full.
• She rips up our foam mattress pad.
• She soaks us with her splashes when taking a bath.

Miss A does growing up.

• She walks all over by herself. (Still a little concerned on the bumpy, cobble street-like roads here)
• She practices standing up from a sitting position--even if that means falling on her padded bum every few seconds.
• She has seven teeth and more coming in!
• She folds her arms for prayer and says amen at the end.
• She knows when we're talking about her and responds.
• She follows simple requests.

What a walker! She carried a ball while walking all through the grocery store yesterday.

Miss A does difficult

• She won't sleep without her pacifier.
• She cries when she doesn't get her way.
• She wines when she doesn't get her way.
• She throws a fit when things don't go her way.
• She wants to sit/stand/walk on her own (even when we're on a crazy moving bus.)

Miss A does taking my heart.

• She "woofs" when she hears the dog and pretend cries when she hears the crying baby in our complex.
• She laughs to get attention and it makes others smile.
• She snuggles in the morning.
• She loves to go to bed and lays her head on our shoulder when we tell her it is time.
• She softens hearts and gives love to the people of Nanjing.

Living in China is the best--thanks to this little one and her dad.